Posts Tagged ‘worries’

Can’t I write about anything else?


Hooray. More work issues. For one, I am so positive hat my current managers have totally forgotten that I am quitting this week. I am too much of a chicken to bring it up, even to Kelsey. I don’t know why feel so intimidated. I felt the same way for some reason at TJ Maxx, and that’s why I stopped working there. Anyways, I should be done there by this Friday.

I got called for the same interview as Cameron last week. We each had our interviews today. I wasn’t so sure I wanted the job, so I didn’t go out of my way to do anything special for it (such as make a resume). I kind of blew the beginning when I said that I wasn’t sure if I could work a night job. (8PM-12PM). Then half way through I realized, “Oh yeah! It wouldn’t be total hell to work until midnight when I wouldn’t have to get up early in the morning. And remember when I worked at McDonald’s and still liked working late?” So right at the end I tried to save myself by saying, “Oh, actually I think I could handle this job with my summer schedule!” But who knows if it worked.

P.S. The library hired someone before interviews. What a surprise. Not.

My camera has been repaired and it works fine. I just want a smaller SD Card so it starts up instantly. Currently Nick let me borrow his 8 gig card so there is a delay. Making it pointless to be a point and shoot camera if I can’t point and shoot. But whatever, it’s fixed. And I will be able to post my own photos soon.

Currently, I am not sure how to spend the large sum of money I planned to spend this summer. I am not going to any music festivals since I found that Neko Case is playing in Grand Rapids, MI. I am going to that in July with Cameron’s mom. So it leaves me with either a tattoo ($300-ish) or this amazing bicycle ($600).

I really want to get either the gypsy face on my right arm, or an anchor arrangement on my chest. I am not sure what one I should do first. It makes most sense to go the Gypsy first since the artist is in town currently, and it would match the style of the mermaid skull on my left arm. The pony tattoo is still not finished because dumb mosquitoes keep biting it so I can’t get it finished.

The bicycle is awesome though. It has a classic 50’s style to it, just like the one I currently ride that is actually from the 50’s. It’d be nice to have a sturdy bike in a style I enjoy. I couldn’t ask for a better bike, really. It has anchor designs on the front and seat and it is a navy blue color. I can get baskets on it and such and it can be nearly exactly like my current bike. I am planning on transferring to a different college (not a community one) in fall 2010. The bike will be used non stop when there is no snow on the ground. Unfortunately I will have to but about $80 in locks for it to ensure the seat or whatever is not stolen. I would also like this bike since I can’t take my current bike on trails and this one seems pretty hardy and able to take on different terrains. It also has 3 speeds.

My dream Bike

My dream Bike

I wish there were better photos of it online showing the anchor details. Anyways, I have to order it into the bike shop, so I am afraid it would end up costing $800… If that’s the case, forget it…


Even Bettah Zahn Mama!


Today I took all that I have learned thus far from the newest addition to the “Mama” series, ‘Gardening Mama’. I finished the vegetable garden that I (with the help of Cameron and my dad) have began. First off, I have way to many cucumber plants. I am sure not all of them are going to live, but they all have sprouts currently. There is about 30 plants. The soil everything is planted in has some spots that have a high amount of clay. am worried the roots will not make it, although there is tons of roots in the soil… Those are weeds though, so I have no idea how easy the vegetables will make it through.

Here is a list of all of the vegetables….
~Bell Peppers (purple, yellow, orange, green, possibly red too.)
~Green Beans
~Sequoia Beans
~Wax Beans
~Butternut Squash
~Summer Squash
~Asparagus (can’t be harvested for one year)
~Sugar Snap Peas

I hope the harvest is as bountiful as the ones I have in Gardening Mama…
New updates on the job front…. I am officially over with my current job on May 29th. I am now trying very hard to get a job in the LCC library. I have three friends who work in opand I hope that will help me. I just submitted my application and I plan on calling them in a few days. I really hope this works out.

Currently I am trying to help my cat Mr. Rags.Mr. Rags 001 He has been sick for a few years, and he’s very thin. He is the same age as another cat in our house (Sergeant Tibbs) and he is actually his brother from the same litter. Mr. Rags is much smaller than Tibbs now. He also has diarrhea constantly. He recently has been peeing in shoes and in a couple spots in the floor. I think the peeing is due to a lack of attention. Lately I have been giving him more attention and I haven’t seen him peeing on the floor. I get really pissed because no one else will give him attention because they think he’s “gross”. Lately I honestly want to punch anyone who hesitates to pet him. I am pretty sure he’s conscious of the fact that people do not give him any attention, which is sad. My mother doesn’t even call him by his name any longer (just ‘grey-cat’) and calls him ‘it’ instead of ‘he’. I get angry and yell every time she does that. I wouldn’t stop respecting someone who had cancer and didn’t look or act like themselves. Love is going to be the best thing for him right now, since the vet can never seem to fix him. So long as he stops peeing outside the litter box there should not be an issue with him in our house. If he continues to pee, I am not sure what to do. I refuse to lock him up in my bedroom, and no one will take in a cat, let alone one that pees outside the litter box. Putting him to sleep is also stupid because he is happy and friendly like any other cat when he gets attention and time to play.

Back to the Drawing Board- Part 2


Oh god. My life is slipping, but I am not all that devastated. Here is the deal. Soon after my rejection from the Social Science job, I found the holy grail of Mackenzie jobs. A Scene Shop Aid. A paid position involving something I have done all through high school. I was so excited, and it was all I could think about for days. The application was not due until June 30th. So I applied. A couple days later I noticed my application had been denied!! So today I called the Stage Tech manager at LCC and asked him about it. THEY HAD ALREADY CHOSEN SOMEONE! How can you hire someone that soon!? They must have known what clown they wanted from the start and only put up the application because they had to be fair. Maggots. I want a student job because I won’t have to worry about my schedule as much and inconveniencing my coworkers and bosses because I have weird hours.

I got my tattoo,which only ended up being $50, which was nice. It’s pretty cool, and I think it turned out well. I don’t think many people like it though. Everyone thinks it’s totally crazy to get a My Little Pony tattoo, but I don’t thin so really. How is it any more crazy than getting anything else? The whole tattoo thing kind of stresses me out.. I think people are too judgmental about them, including me sometimes.

Anyways, the artist is new to tattooing and her name is Lily. She did a pokemon tattoo for Cameron fairly recently. I sat a long time and I went on a lunch break with her and the artist who sits with her and watches her, Perry. So when we came back my leg was all puffy and we decided to do a second sitting. So currently, my pony is flesh-colored. She will be teal once I go back. She has her little tribal belly dance costume colored though. (Did I mention in my previous entry that she was a belly dancing pony?)

I have no photos yet because my camera is broken! I was really worried at first because I didn’t want to pay for a new camera, but it turns out I was still under warranty. So I’ll just take photos once I get it all finished and my camera is working again.

Here is my current worry. My current job is cutting my hours, which is great because I like having more spare time to do nothing, but sadly I am getting only about $100 a week. I have a long list of frivolous expenses in the coming months which concerns me.
1. Approximately $70 in belly dance lessons in July
2. A pair of Official Bettie Page shoes- $50
3. $300 tattoo. The artist who did the skull on my shoulder is in Lansing over the summer and I want him to do another image on my opposite shoulder of a Gypsy. I want to make sure it gets done before he leaves because I am not sure if he will come back. I am really concerned with artist consistency, so I wouldn’t have another artist do this particular tattoo.

My hours will be cut severely in June when I start a face to face class in June at LCC. Then I will probably have to quit my job completely by July, or definitely by August. Okay. I really don’t need the Bettie Page shoes. But I still have a lot of frivolous expenses.

Back to the Drawing Board.


Well. My 2 years worth of bad karma has caught up with me. I didn’t get the job. Big stinkin’ surprise. So Friday was my cry-day. I felt better when Nick and my mom and I went to Woody’s Oasis, and then TJ Maxx. At TJ Maxx we found some metallic bronze stretch pants. They were $3, so we bought them all for costumes for a space movie we want to make.

Also, I tried some of my new pin-up style make up on, but I cried if off a few times, so I had to keep replacing it. I need to take some photos to put up here so I can track my progress, but Friday was a bad day for that. Also, I tried to do victory rolls for the first time ever, and it turned out alright. I need to work on it a little, but so far, so good. I used a great tutorial from YouTube for my hair.

So, I realized that I still have some great chances to get good jobs on campus. I am going to try and apply for the newspaper as a photographer or something. And I have many other positions i have also applied for. I just wanted that Social Science one most of all. Oh well… I have already started on scheduling for fall semester, and I am trying to take morning classes, but I am signed up for one night class (biology) because two of my friends are enrolling in it and it will help to have a study group.

Also, I am getting a tattoo tomorrow, which is always great. I will most definitely take photos of it to put up on here.

So, this is it…


In one hour it will be tomorrow. This is terrible for me. A lot is riding on tomorrow, for it is when I find out if I did or did not get a job. I am scared. I really tried hard for it. I already put approximately $80 into getting this job. (I bought the little suit-like outfit). I really would appreciate the job because I would love to have awesome college references for future jobs once I have my degree… If I ever get a degree… I really liked the woman who interviewed me too, and I think she liked me. I just keep thinking that some maggot with more receptionist experience will get the job, because they are more wholesome and are piercing less.
No. Social Science people like the crazy ones, right? Garble. I just want to meet Sociology professors who will take me under their wings.
I cannot decide what is worse. Receiving the call that says, “Sorry Mackenzie, you just weren’t right for the position…” or no call at all. If I didn’t get this job, it was a total waste of confidence. I did stinking awesome on that interview.
Glarp. I feel sick, and tired. I need to get to sleep. Let’s name some things I can look forward to this weekend?

1. Kickball with friends, although I am not sure if it will be too wet.
2. Victorian Day- Always awesome.
3. Shiit… There is something else.. Oh yeah, Vampire.
4. All those were on Saturday, but Friday I get to practice belly dance.

All I can think about is my efforts failing. Everyone tells me to stay positive. But I was positive on the day it mattered. I was confident and positive. Now I am in freak out mode. I am still confident, but I just don’t want to be disappointed.